I began 2020 in a dark place — the NEC, or at least that’s what the halls of the National Exhibition Centre looked like before any of the events went up. Black floors, endless high black flowing drapes, and even higher ceilings. Birmingham’s NEC was a place I worked at often, setting up and taking down apparatus and equipment for large events in Birmingham, UK. Once all the kit for these various events was set up, the place could look entirely different — but after one has been exposed to hall’s bare, initial darkness, no amount of apparatus can distract from the hollow expanse of a unit the shows were housed in.
At the end of the first month of 2020, I was let go from the events crewing company I worked with — thankfully, I haven’t had to set foot in the dark abyss of the NEC ever since.
I took the money I made from the company and did something beautiful with it — I traveled to Asia for the first time. I rode the bumpy desert plains of Doha in a 4x4. At times it felt like our driver was crazy because of the way he drove so close the edge of high dunes with steep drops. But he was just having fun. Where there was nothing but sand, he could drive us around wherever he wanted, like a kid with a toy car on a beach.
From Doha, I continued on to Thailand. A place where I ate food I’d never eaten, shared unusual experiences with strangers, spoke words in languages I’d never used, and made memories that now I look back on with feelings of nostalgia.
When I returned to England, I did so at the right time. It was as if the security panels of lockdown came sliding down behind me not long after I arrived back at the end of February.
Thankfully I had a job as a bicycle courier, delivering fast food, Chinese food and groceries to people — and I was allowed to do it whether there was a lockdown or not. So off I went, delivering for months, cycling against time while customers waited in the seclusion of their homes.
Then the summer came, and I was tired. So tired in fact, that I couldn’t even do deliveries any more. My legs became weak and my head became foggy. I was sick, and I’ve remained this way till the date of writing this.
Ironically, being sick has given my creativity a new lease of life. I’ve been using my time at home to make what I love to make — videos from my travels and times with friends, visual artwork, and of course — music. Despite feeling unwell, I am grateful for this time.
So why did I choose this sample to describe my 2020?
Maybe it’s the darkness of the melody reminding me of the empty NEC halls, or the beautiful nostalgic chimes of a music box taking me back to Thailand. Or perhaps it is the constant ticking, like time passing as many of our lives seem to spiral out of our control. Beyond our grasp, like a tiny car veering down a sand dune, I’m sure many of us during the year 2020, not just myself — have felt like they’re being toyed with.
